Holy shit I’m 50... fuck 50! (not a poetry post)

My photo, age 50

My photo, age 50

This is just a post to celebrate myself, 50 years on this spinning hell-stone, self-rescued from a lot of life’s bullshit, some of it self-inflicted, some of it on purpose, some of it out of my control... but I’m proud of myself for keeping in shape, trying to eat healthy most of the time, raising 2 of the best children a father could ever ask for and overcoming alcoholism, fits of depression, divorce, foreclosure and bankruptcy... for the most part I am at peace and comfortable with life... I need to write more... I need to become a recluse and fight to find better poetry... I need a love that understands and allows my personality... I need to make it to 60 - and then we’ll see...

this cut of land

gray lines have yet to form
surface smooth as river rock
sun upon this cut of land
sky immune to the killing-clock

early feast, the sweetest dew
silence moves in secrecy
partaken flower, wanton tongue
and entrances to lunacy

remember when the ambered boasts
huddled in a dream forlorn
taste again the need to begin
springtime seed with hunger born

save these best, these innocent
thrills of eyes, this priming vice
where guilty hands have yet to touch
true beauty thrives with tempered fright